Dating Today: My Two Cents

Thursday, April 22, 2010

So I've just spent the better part of an hour tracking down the various clips to Nightline's 'Why Can't A Successful Black Woman Find A Man?". They had their own experts on both sides of the issue and Steve Harvey to help mediate the discussion, but I still feel like they talked around the main issue. How long is this same issue going to be discussed? Ok, so the world knows that there are 1.8 million more black women than men. Well then why aren't we prepared to look outside our race for a partner? If you know that it is statistically much harder to find someone of your own race, why are women still stubbornly pigeon holing themselves into an even narrower pool of possibilities?

I am not going to lie. I have standards and things I would like from any partner in a relationship. Maybe they've changed, maybe they've become a bit broader as I age, but they're still there - and let me tell you right now they're not going anywhere. The men who spoke on Nightline mentioned women with 'The Denzel Complex' - those who were looking for a type of man that just doesn't exist outside of the movies. Well if I'm not supposed to ask for too much here, can I at least ask for a man who doesn't stare at my tits and doesn't recognize that I have a brain? If, as Hill Harper says, I'm supposed to look for potential, can I ask for a man who's employed and able to support himself? Who isn't trying to holla at me while living in his mom's basement? I'm just saying that if I can pay rent so can you.

Maybe I'll be single and die alone with cats - who knows. What I guess I know is that either way I'm not wasting my time on someone who asks me to buy his groceries or who isn't interested in anything more then when's the next time I can come over and rock his world. Because I have too many dreams and too many ambitions to be wasting them on a man who doesn't see or want anything but the outside.

The End.

The Krimson Venom said...

Lets see..check, check, check..still living with moms....(crosses name off list)...alright...

I havent seen the segment cause frankly, I'm tired of hearing about it. Me, I've been rejected by all races. Yea there's plenty of good black women. But from what I see, they've all been taken by bigger guys than me. Ther's the few of us that actually care for a woman's personaility (side flirt: your smile captivates me more than your chest) though thats not enough. It's like we have to have more materials than that. i'd prefer a MUTUAL relationship, give and take.

From MY end, I kinda wanna know why deez niggas score a hawt chick who pays for everything and drives their "car in the shop" ass around? The whole "Nice guy" routine, Dateline should do something on why a lot of girls go for the "bad boy" that rips their heart out only for them to run back.

....I'll stay off that soapbox for a lil bit....

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